Ladies and gentlemen, I'm proud to report that the strike is going well. Our brothers and sisters on the line are still going strong, even as the strike rolls into its third month. Also, I'm pleased to announce we have reached a deal with United Artists that will allow our writers to return to work for the studio under conditions we find acceptable. We're hoping to close similar deals with the other independent studios, and we're hoping such progress will pressure the major studios and TV networks to bend to our demands.
Having said that, I have a confession to make, and while I know you will initially be shocked, I ask you to reach the end of this e-mail before judging me.
As I'm typing this, I am breaking my previous pledge not to watch TV until the strike has come to an end and each and every writer is back at work.
Please know that I do not take pride in having broken that vow, and also that I am not enjoying it. However, I received an e-mail earlier today that forced my hand in the matter.
The contents of the e-mail were simple enough. No text in the body, just an attached Excel file. What was the file? Tonight's line-up for the National Broadcasting Company.
I know none of you have been watching TV, either, but have you seen this crap? Two hours of Deal or No Deal followed by two hours of the new American Gladiators. Seriously.
And if that weren't bad enough, it's not just your everyday tripe (by the way, has anyone ever tried potted meat? Delicious.) it's DonD theme night, the first hour being the 70s and the second being the 80s. Corey Feldman is on my TV right now. I'm not happy.
I may have to shoot myself in the face before Gladiators starts, so I'm even going to start in on that.
I know that when we started this strike, we were prepared for this kind of thing. We knew the networks were going to have to find something to put on the air, and as I stood before many of you the night before we took to the picket lines, I told you this day would come and begged you to be strong.
Brothers and sisters, I'm beginning to think I may have been wrong.
There is a time for strength, and a time to admit defeat. While I cannot make this decision without conferring with the rank and file, I'm beginning to think the time for strength may have passed.
NBC is rolling out new episodes of some of their big shows this Thursday, episodes that were written by members of the Guild. Normally, though, there would be new episodes of the Office. Instead, viewers are offered The Celebrity Apprentice.
As I'm writing this, and likely when you read it, the ratings are not be out for tonight's line-up. I don't know how many people are tuning in to this schlock, but I'm not looking forward to finding out. Even if the ratings are incredibly low, I think we risk losing something incredibly important if this strike drags on much longer.
Eventually, just as NBC is trying to do with The Office, the shows we have worked so hard to create will eventually be rendered irrelevant, if not by a large, spandex-wearing man named Wolf, then by untold horrors that have not been created yet.
I'm afraid to continue this strike. I'm afraid that by doing so, rather than forcing the networks to give us more compensation for DVD releases and other New Media ventures, we are merely giving them carte blanche to put whatever they can find on the air, regardless of the entertainment value.
I feel this dumbing down of the medium can have two consequences, neither of which are good for us. On one hand, the viewers may eat stuff like Gladiators right up, rendering us useless. On the other hand, the viewers may revolt, creating a situation where the networks could paint us as the bad guys.
I'll be honest with you. This whole situation is a result of a failure of leadership on my part. I should have seen this coming, and while I knew the networks would have to find replacement programming, I did not forsee them sinking this low. American Gladiators? Really?
For that oversight, I apologize.
Brothers and sisters, I ask you to at least consider authorizing me to enter immediate negotiations with the networks, and take whatever they offer. Any other action, I feel, risks throwing the baby out with the bathwater.
I also ask that you keep this communication secret, as it has the potential to paint us in a weak light. I assure you, that is not the case. I am merely suggesting that we make the smartest decision available to us, and not allow the networks to destroy the medium that Philo T. Farnsworth created so many years ago (That's for you, Aaron.).
Thanks in advance for your support,
AJB.
P.S. The intro for Gladiators just starting. I'm serious, guys. Let's put the signs away.
P.P.S. Have you guys heard that Soulja Boy song? What's all that superman business about?
